As you move toward divorce, it’s natural to turn to your friends for support and even advice. You want to talk — or vent, as the case may be — and they’re there to support you. Plus, if you know someone who has already been divorced and you never have before, you figure they can give you some important insights.
It’s fine to get advice about different parts of life that surround divorce, like how to tell your mutual friends or what hobbies you should take up to distract yourself. And it’s definitely all right to talk to your friends when things feel tough. That support is important.
What you don’t want to do is to get any legal advice from your friends. Divorce cases, like relationships, are unique. Your friends mean well, but they were not in your situation and can’t really speak to it. For instance, someone may tell you to fight for sole custody of your child because they got sole custody and they enjoy it when doing so is actually not in the best interests of your child and it’s never going to get approved by the court. Your divorce is not their divorce.
Plus, your friends are biased in your favor. They’re your friends. They want to make you feel better and they are going to take your side. That bias could lead them to instruct you to do things that really run contrary to the realities of your situation. They don’t mean to do it, but they just can’t look at the situation rationally when they’re so far in your camp.
Of course, it is important to learn as much as you can about the divorce process. Just be wary of where you get your information.